Remember Your Worth; Stop Trying to Prove It!! 

“If you find yourself constantly trying to prove your worth to someone, you have already forgotten your value.” ~Unknown

You can hold your own in any conversation. You stand out in a crowded room, shining bright like a diamond. You have educated yourself and built a solid career. You have a faith that can move mountains. Even with your flaws (yes, we all have those too!!), who you are demonstrates strength, value and exceptional confidence! And you show consistent support of those around you. You are blessed and are a blessing to others.


With all these great qualities that clearly reflect the value-add that you bring to any relationship, why are you walking around feeling defeated and worthless? Why are you trying to prove your worth to someone else? For some reason, you have felt a need to prove your worth to the very ones who will never see it. Stop it!! Just stop it!! Attempting to prove your worth to someone who doesn’t see your value and doesn’t even know their own worth is worthless! The longer you put forth effort to prove your worth the more you lose your value.


The effort to prove your worth could be in a marital or dating relationship, among family members, friends, leaders and work colleagues, or even your church family members. Often times those close challenging relationships requiring you to always prove your worth, are based on the other person’s issues that they project on you. The transference of their own lack of self-worth. You have to know that IT IS NOT YOU and that you are worth your weight in gold!! It means you are in a toxic situation that may require you to make major change.  If that means it’s time to walk away, then walk away. It’s time to change your environment and surround yourself with people where your value is seen as golden. You don’t have to prove anything! Just be true to who you are and remember who you are daily.


Remember your worth and walk in your greatness, being all that you were designed to be!

Walk in your PESSCE Wholeness!



​Our God given ability to preserve memories is a natural capability often taken for granted. For many without the use of modern technology many of the great experiences of life are lost in the depths of our minds, buried well below the challenges that we maintain at the forefront of our minds instead. The memories that seem to always stand the test of time are those of the people we loved or who impacted your life in profound ways.
Last night, during a process of transferring old VHS recordings to digital, floods of memories surfaces while watching a video recording of my 1989 high school Senior Day and Graduation. Wow!! So many great memories to watch but also heartbreaking to watch. Seeing the faces of friends who have passed away. Even though some I may have only seen at most only once or twice since 1989, they were each still considered such dear friends to me.
Life begins with birth and ends with death. Death is a part of life, and countless numbers of lives transition each day. The memories of these friends and loved ones is really what keeps some people going forward each day. At the same time, those memories may also be the burden that some carry who can’t process that their loved one is no longer with them. It is important to give them opportunity to grieve, but it is also important to help them find their emotional stability through their spiritual strength. The stability will come once the beautiful memories of their loved one are put in proper perspective. This will demonstrate Spiritual Wholeness that supports their Emotional Wholeness.
I recall at the end of 2016, there were a significant number of social media comments and news stories on the number of celebrity of deaths over the course of that year. I recall thinking, were the number of deaths, specifically celebrity deaths more that year, or just more notable?  I would venture to say the latter is true. I don’t have statistical data on hand to support this assertion, but I am sure there would be valid support. If the person who passes away isn’t considered a well know singer, songwriter, musician, actor, director or any other Hollywood work category, the death just comes and goes. There is limited impact and discussion except to those close friends and relatives directly impacted by the death.

As I think of my friends and loved ones who have passed away, I want to always remember and hope that people would not just focus on the notable deaths, but consider all who are impacted by the inevitable and find a way to provide spiritual and emotional support to others whenever possible. Death is really tough for many people to process, and they will need encouragement to move forward and experience all that life still has for them to experience. They still have more life to live here on earth! Let’s help them live life to the fullest! And for you, when the inevitable comes your way, as we all know it will someday, be sure you have done all you can to live life to the fullest. Living a life that is pleasing to God knowing that eternal life will be your gain. PESSCE Wholeness!

Source: My Original PESSCE Website


​You just want your happiness to be real. Right? The reality is that it may often be short lived or none existent if you are seeking that happiness from external sources, i.e., people, places, things. It is most likely those placeholders you have put in place for your happiness will disappoint you. People fall short, places become less exciting, and things lose value. I had a young lady recently share with me the disappointment of her misguided happiness. She is 30 years old and disappointed with her marriage. She and her husband have known each other since they were children. They were high school sweethearts, prom king and queen, married by 21 and hopeful they would be having children soon. She stated, “he was all I knew, he was my happiness!” My only thought was, wow!! He was your happiness? Of course, the second half of the story wasn’t so much the fairytale.
She went on to say how sad and disappointed she currently is with the way things have been lately. Unfortunately, the happiness she once placed in her husband is now none existent due to his poor life choices and just bad behavior. All her happiness was placed with this person and he of course disappointed. Her story is one that reminded me of the importance of a true relationship with the Lord.
The photo included in this post is of my niece, I affectionately call, “the lil baby.” Whenever I need a reminder of the simplicity of happiness that comes from God, I look at this picture of the lil baby, and I just smile. Sometimes, I even want to run out in my back yard, roll in the grass and throw my legs in the air just like her! The happiness on her face is priceless. God can give this to you too, even if you are not a 2-year-old toddler but a 30-year-old unhappy wife. Find your happiness internal, between you and your God. The real God. Not the substitutes you put in place. People, places and things will fail to fulfill. Now my God; yes, you can trust that He will not fall short. The happiness you seek external, seek internal, and know that God will fulfill the desires of your heart and give you more happiness than you could ever imagine from any external source. 

Source: My Original PESSCE Website

Its time! Time to make a change. Time to make difference choices. Given the outcomes of many of your past and even current choices, making a different choice may not be such a bad idea. It can be really challenging as a Christian to accept, address and adjust behavioral choices that result in outcomes that are not reflective of who you present yourself to be. Those such actions have to change in order for there to be positive impact on those assigned to you; your spouse, children, friends, family, coworkers and even strangers should know Christ through you.

Everyone has something they deal with or struggle with each day, even as a Christian. So no one is alone in the struggle and the need for change. For some, the correction of behavior may come easy and for others it’s a daily struggle to make a different choice. Be strong, trust God and know that He loves you, will strengthen you, forgives you and is waiting on you. Seek Him for the needed strength to do things differently and to be the positive influence in the lives of others that he needs you to be.

Source: My Original PESSCE Website